A Scientific Paper

07 Mar 2019 - Allen Zhou


A Novel Attitude on the Plausibility of the Third Planet From the Sun as a Polyhedron Made of a Triangular Base and Three Faces Joining Corresponding Sides

Allen Zhou, Hogwarts Academy

Abstract: The objective of this paper is to prove that the shape of the Earth is of a triangular prism. It will be easy for the reader to believe and understand upon reading this paper. Proof of arguments comes in the form of theoretical and physical evidence.

Keywords: word, Earth, true, believe, huge


What is the shape of the Earth? Throughout the course of history, influential, esteemed, and average people have asked this question. Is the earth spherical, as the Greeks proposed in the 6th century BC, or flat as a disc, as argued in early Mesopotamian mythology, or shaped as an ellipsoid, as described by Isaac Newton in Newton's “Philosophiae Naturalis Principia Mathematica?” Now is the time to do as Rene Descartes said. To question everything. To treat every innate and acquired belief as someone you just met. In this manner one can truly learn what is true or false. It is with this mindset that is required when digesting the information in this paper.

I am here to further discuss and  test an idea that is already well-known and widely accepted as fact in the scientific community.

The Earth is not spherical, flat, or elliptical. It is a triangular prism. At first glance, this idea may seem somewhat absurd. But, upon further inspection, it is obvious why so many esteemed scientists have backed this idea.



The steps taken that led to the findings reported in this paper are as follows.

  1. Gather materials: laptop with an i7 processor, Xbox One S, wire cutters, Ferrari, Pina Colada, paper, pencil
  2. Conduct thought experiments and computer simulations.



To find proof for the plausibility of a triangular prism shaped Earth. First, because angular momentum, the product of its moment of inertia and its angular velocity,  is always conserved unless an external torque is exerted. Combine this idea with the equation:

L = IW

L - angular momentum.

I - moment of inertia.

W - angular velocity.

The motion of the Earth affects the shape of the earth due to the forces exerted. Second, see how the masts of ships on the ocean coming over the horizon appear before the bow? This is because that is exactly where the edge of the triangular prism of the Earth is. Third, Oprah Winfrey has stated that the Earth is in fact not a sphere. If the reader is still not satisfied with these arguments, then the complex nature of these ideas is probably unable to be understood and never will be understood. It is advisable that those who are unable to comprehend these ideas should take a test for Panic Disorder (PD), Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD), Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), or Genuine Disorder (GD).



Of all of Swift’s satirical targets, there is one attitude that is strikingly similar. They may have different views or social and economic standing or physical characteristics or genealogy, but fundamentally, all are narrow minded. It is with this idea in mind that my satire is written. In modern society, people often make judgements without seeing the full picture. From voting for a politician without understanding the policies to ignoring logic and reason, people are making irrational decisions that harm themselves and their societal culture. My satire attempts to put a magnifying glass over our everyday decisions and how people view the world around them through their own tinted glasses. Specifically, it exposes the problems with academia and the complex nature of scientific papers that are impossible for the layperson to understand or just too many pages to read. Accessibility of knowledge is important to the success of a society, as it leads to people who are more rational and likely to be respectful and caring members of society.


I wish to thank Mr. Kyrie Irving for his technical support during the theoretical experimentation process.

I would also like to express my deep gratitude to Professor Bobby Ray Simmons Jr.  and SpongeBob Squarepants for their assistance in collecting the mechanical testing data and handling the instruments. My thanks are also extended to The Flat Earth Society for helping to fund my research.

Special thanks should be given to Professor Trump, my research project mentor, for his valuable guidance and constructive suggestions.



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2."The Effect of Country Music on Suicide", Social Forces, 1992.

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  2. Rats can’t always tell the difference between Japanese spoken backwards and Dutch spoken backwards, winner, Linguistics, 2007.